I don’t know which scenario is worse: a) Your mildew is now a sentient being and has made its own slime hand with which it likely plans to grab your ass; b) you bought and installed soap shaped like a hand that will likely grab your ass. Wait, I’m having an epiphany. The latter is worse and makes you an idiot. Now you don’t have to worry about dropping the soap so much as you have to worry about the soap slipping its own cold, slimy mitt up your crack. Unless you’re into that kind of stuff. In which case, try not to confuse the jizz with your shampoo.