I realized today what makes airline seats so annoying. It’s not the narrow butt clearance, the jimmy-rigged tray latch or dearth of legroom. It’s the headrest, which insistently presses your head forward like a 17-year-old getting a blow job. Yeah, someone invented a solution for this about 1000 years ago, but now that solution comes in Pierre, Dolphin Dan and Zombie Cat ($35 each). For my next post, I’ll be reinventing the wheel in needlefelt and discovering knitted fire.
Zombie cat, zombie cat, your juices are bleeding through
Zombie Cat, Zombie Cat, up from your vault
Around my neck you pirouette
Support my head and catch my sweat
Break the laws that death imposes
To help master when he dozes
From your carcass maggots run
Undead mice your only fun
Zombie Cat, Zombie Cat, your juices are bleeding through,
Zombie Cat, Zombie Cat, up from your vault
(Original “Smelly Cat” lyrics here: http://www.elyrics.net/read/p/pheobe-lyrics/smelly-cat-lyrics.html – if you can endure the busy, horrible webpage every lyrics site appears to favor.)