I know we’re called Badder Homes & Gardens and not Badder Accessories & Whatever The Fuck We Feel Like posting about, but these Cat Hats with Ear Flaps demand an exception. Except it’s not really an exception at all because if you even sort of, kind of, maybe considered buying one, you’re clearly a shut-in and honestly, what could be more homey? P.S. Don’t at all think of that as a judgment, I, myself, am headed that way. See you in the chatrooms, furball58.

A co-worker sent this to me and said, “Definitely an ornament that knows how to hang.” Mostly because it looks a penis with a pug head. Just wanted to make sure you’re getting that… It’s too bad, too, because that’s a pretty cute mug on that pug, eh?

Look what the ding-a-lings at FLOR did. They give you the idea and know-how to cut a regular-shaped rug into an animal-shaped rug. They remind me of every single girl at Senior Prom — giving that shit away for free.

Should I be worried that the very first thing that popped into my head when I saw this was, “Here I am! Rock me like a Whorey Jane!” Or more worried that the second thing was a really long inner monologue about how her hairstyle is clearly not a Jane hairstyle and more of a Betsy or a Elle? I’m worried. The first thing to pop into my head should have been a deep concern about labial splinters. In the wise words of Dr. Dre, never let me slip cuz if I slip then I’m slippin’. Ya heard?

“You already drink like a fish so you and this wine holder have a lot in common, but unlike you it can hold it’s liquor.” And that, boys and girls, is what we call The Ultimate Pun-un-un-un. (<– That’s The Ultimate Echo.)

Your family can put funeral carnations in this terrifying seal vase after you die from it stealing your soul. Just FYI, from the look on his face, I’m pretty sure he’s also gonna steal your underwear.

Dudes, a tent with a mouse on it is super dangerous. Mice attract hungry snakes. Snakes attract hungry hawks. Hawks attract hungry bears. Bears attract hungry leather daddies. Leather daddies attract major chafing, and no one EVER remembers to pack baby powder when they’re camping.

True to pre-Thanksgiving-give-up-a-thon form, the magnet may be quintuple-nutted, but the post is still half-assed.

If you have more than one of these tables, they’re called Octopuses or Octopi or, if you’re going British English, Octopodes. But if you have more than two of these tables, you’re probably just some sort of deranged calamari fucker. Seriously, what’s your damage?

via Alan “Rip Rap a Rippity Rip Rap” McCoy

This is a portrait of me in Junior High. I went through a really attractive “frighteningly underweight while wearing a patchwork vest” phase. And, yes, I know what you’re thinking. Everyone did wanna hit it.