Cigarette smoke contains over 4,000 chemicals, which is precisely how many times this fugly-ass candle ashtray will be repinned on Pinterest (follow me!) by black-lunged, porch-lounging vegans who work as part-time baristas until their spoken-word poetry careers take off.
Friday, April 27, 2012
Monday, April 9, 2012
This doormat is like a statement t-shirt for your house. It’s says, “Hey, isn’t this funny? I didn’t think of it at all. But I think it’s funny therefore I must be funny. Pull my finger.”
Tuesday, April 3, 2012
Wednesday, March 28, 2012
You know what I love the most about these candlesticks? The fact that I can finally say, “Oh my gosh, I love your camel toe.”
P.S. These are on sale on Fab.com right now. Sign up, you schmucks.
Thursday, March 22, 2012
Oh, I see how it is, Internet. The paper towel cubby is sooooo genius, but my corpse cubby just gets me put on another government watch list.
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
If you don’t actually have shit for brains, you’ll save yourself $598 and make this Bubble Wrap Vase your damn self. Just use real bubble wrap, you dummy, or if you want to take up glass blowing, go right ahead. I hear you’re pretty good at blowing stuff…
Monday, March 12, 2012
Friday, February 10, 2012
Let the world’s most renowned analrapist carry your prayers directly to Jesus’ ears. Do I really need to say anything more about this Tobias Funke prayer candle? Oh, yes. You’re welcome.
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
Sloppy drunk has never been so clean. Until now, the shower was the one place American companies had neglected to shoe-horn a cup holder. Of course, Tub Mug likely means the death of my cup-holder shaped breast implant concept. But there are plenty more ideas where that came from. Quick, someone pass me that box of fortune cookies.
Friday, December 9, 2011
There’s a much easier way to hide your thermostat, garage door opener, fuse box or whatever. Just leave bodies laying around your house. No one notices the walls when they’re constantly stepping over rotting Grandmas. Especially if it’s their rotting Grandma. Think, people. THINK.