You can buy these Solar Powered Animal Nightlights at Nigel’s Eco Store. That’s right, Nigel’s Eco Store. The only thing getting less laid than that store is no one. Not even that fucking Welch’s Grapes guy. And that guy hasn’t seen a vagina since the day he was born and even then his mom, like, totally blitzed out on an epidural.

I bet you think I’m just posting this light because it has a swear word built in. But that’s not it. I just think your sassy pussycat might enjoy batting at the shuttlecock for a bit, channeling her inner boxer. It’ll be pretty cathartic until she, who really has a lot of energy most days, grows weary and refuses bash it around. But that’s okay, because sleep is super important for a kitten. And why didn’t you just hang it up in the first place, you dumb fuck?

bleep bleep

via my Florida pally Maggie Sage at Sage Sisters Press

Whoa, it’s so beautiful. Buy one for the hippie in your life and hope that they stare into it in wonder until their dilated pupils burn out and that coating of patchouli oil fries their skin. Strike that. Stare into it until your pupils burn out. Then get one of those helper dogs and teach it to secretly snarl at children when their parents’ backs are turned. But if you’re blind, you can’t appreciate their looks of shear terror. Ah, fuck it. It’s not worth it.

Via the oh so mysterious FiPi LeLe.

Isn’t it weird how you can hate something in real life, but love it as art, objects and pictures? That’s pretty much the philosophy behind Facebook, no?

Early Bird Pendant Light, $180

Crude, yet bright. It’s like lookin’ in the mirror.

via Oh Joy!

I was a little disturbed when my first thought about these Pop Baby Lamps was, “I wanna eat those babies.” But not as disturbed as the time I got a job as a maternity nurse and my first thought was, “I wanna eat those babies.” I’m not kidding, guys, they looked fucking delicious.

via Stephanie “Sorry I Ruined Your Life” Fisher

When I tire of spending my tens of twenties at Anthropologie I occasionally like to throw some change at a local artisan. Like MaterialRecovery in San Antionio. Neat pillows. Neat lampshades. Neat way to not make the rent possibly ever.

This faucet light lamp thing is rad. Even if it does look like a less colorful version of that sticky stuff that comes out of a pee pee. Talkin’ ‘bout Technicolor cum, y’all.

Uh oh, looks like someone found Daddy (or Mommy Two)’s Playboy stash.

LEGO Head Lamp, $11.95

The next time you have a night so wild you’re literally swinging from the chandelier, be proactive. Make it a Light Mi from designer Miriam Zink. It’s made of hangers. So, you get your rocks off and save yourself that inconvenient trip to the back alley. Because that’s where you can always be sure to find extra hangers in the recycle bin. You know, for all the stuff you bought on your drunk shopping spree? I’m talking about Frugan Living, here. What did you think I was talking about?

Via