If you’ve ever suspected that your parents screwed you and your name is longer than five letters, it’s officially official. They did. Krazystraws are personalized straws that can say anything you want under five characters. Silver lining? ALL the four letter words fit. Even ‘pube.’
Thursday, April 18, 2013
Tuesday, March 12, 2013
These Thumb Tacks are more fun than a night at the clubs. And likely filled with less pricks.
Sunday, February 17, 2013
It’s a good thing this isn’t life size or, you know, you’d need a microscope to see yours. Oh wait, this isn’t a dick…
Tuesday, January 29, 2013
If you melted away my outsides you’d find two dusty ovaries and a bottle of Heinz vinegar, but if you melt away this cat candle you’ll find a metal skeleton of amazement…and hopefully tetanus.
Monday, December 3, 2012
Hold on. Recovering from vomiting after writing that terrible post title. “All your post titles are terrible.” Well, you can go to hell. Be sure to say “hi” to my mom when you get there. Back to this post. It’s about this Jon Hamm coloring book I found via the Etsy Pinterest boards. Love it. Because nothing says “holidays” like a coloring book about a handsome, lushy anti-hero with a burger problem. Except waking up dazed in a strange bed next to a department store Santa. Or a handwritten card that reads, “One free pass for anal.”
Thursday, November 29, 2012
Friday, October 19, 2012
There’s a fine line between creative genius and homicidal psychosis, and that line is BFA diploma viewed from the side while it’s laying on a table. There’s also a fine line between blogging and being investigated by the FBI, and that line is a Google search bar that’s constantly populated by the words “Ed Gein human skin lamp.”
Friday, October 5, 2012
Turns out the light’s not at the end of the tunnel… it’s in the corner of your bedroom, right in front of the camera your landlord installed to watch you have sex. Needless to say, he shut off the camera feed long ago and now files your rent checks under “Penis Repeller.”
Monday, October 1, 2012
CLEAR! your counter and bring your toast back to toasty with this SHOCKINGLY cool toaster. Now if you’ll excuse me I’m going to go toss it in the tub with some Mr. Bubble since I just double punned in a single post.
Thursday, September 27, 2012
Not only does this roller fork make eating pizza much easier, but it also greatly improves the efficiency of wiener-based cannibalism.